Ever wondered what SEGA smells like? I appreciate that’s a bit of an abstract concept, but if you had to put one particular scent to the brand, what would it be? To me, when I think SEGA, I think 90s; which means the all-encompassing aroma of nylon, sweat-soaked soft play attractions, the weird alkaline whiff you’d get when blowing into a GameBoy to make it work (in hindsight this may have been fairly hazardous, sorry Mum).
And of course, that unique, inimitable, curious blend of cigarette smoke, moulding carpet, sickly sweetness and burning plastic that you could only find wandering into a Blockbuster. Call it revolting, and it sure as hell is, but something about that pong will forever comfort me. It shall be dearly, dearly missed. The closest replica you can get nowadays is CeX, but that more often than not is just the one-two ‘no thanks’ combo of urine and marijuana. At least they’ll buy my aging Mr. Bean DVDs for 20p over market value. Good eggs, they are.
Scents of SEGA
Well, we need ponder this question no longer, as SEGA have announced they’re putting out official colognes based on some of the company’s most beloved IPs; allowing gamers the world over to have their olfactors oscillated by spritzes of their favourite characters’ distilled essences. The products are on the SEGA Shop, and are currently available for a December pre-order, shipping for £30 a pop. For those unfamiliar with the world of perfume, that may seem steep, but take it from someone who has several female relatives/associates to buy for every Christmas: it’s not. It’s really, really, really not.
How do they smell?
Among the lineup is, of course, Sonic T. Hedgehog, whose fragrance “boasts an aroma of fresh citrus, a zing of grapefruit zest and exotic lemon and lime, topped with the scene of the ocean breeze and chilled melon fade.” Fans can also “take pleasure in the rich base tones of leather, suede, and cedar,” and the page further assures us that the product “given the seal of approval from the famous speedy hedgehog himself.” I can only hope that Sonic didn’t personally sign off on Secret Rings, otherwise his vetting standards might give us cause for concern.
If the Blue Blur doesn’t tickle your schnozz, there are a couple of other options. First up is Shenmue, which seems to pop up a fair bit in SEGA news these days. Patrons of that choice will be getting “top notes of clashing cardamom and bergamot, smouldering golden tobacco, deep orris and a strong patchouli base.” I’m sure Ryo is nodding in approval mid-battle somewhere. You’ve also got a Yakuza-inspired ‘Bourbon and Smoke’ cologne, although at the time of writing its page has been taken down from the store. Either it’s sold out, or the actual yakuza got involved in some capacity. Either way, devotees of that franchise might be waiting a little longer to get their stink on.
Part of me is disappointed that the Sonic one didn’t incorporate notes of chili dog, but hey: can’t have it all. Or anything anymore, now that Blockbuster is – sorry, still on that. Scars’ll never heal.
Will you be picking up any of these colognes? Let us know!
Via, SEGA Shop.
